Thursday, March 22, 2007

Vaat is de (dark) matter, baba joon?

My brother tells me it's eerie to sleep in a half-empty house. A half-empty dormroom is pretty eerie too, and I don't have the luxury of running to Mamman's in the middle of the night if my diaper needs changing.

Peter, my roommate, has left me. We hardly exchanged a word about the move, since I was hosting AG, but suffice it to say that my half-Persian from Harvard is moving in with smarter, whiter roommates who will inspire him in his quest for dark matter. I don't blame him.

He didn't say it, but I think he felt guilty abandoning me...he gave me his rice cooker, which I use to make tea since all the pots belonged to him.

Peter and I never spoke more than two words while he was living here...we had nothing to say! We only spoke in music, taking turns blasting classical music on the rare occasions when we were both at home. He made me appreciate Debussy, and I introduced him to Prokofiev's war sonatas.

In the final days, AG asked Peter about his work on dark matter, which I had never dared to do. He got an obnoxious/confusing answer: "When I'm gone from Stanford," said Peter, "I will have completely rewritten the computer program that represents our understanding of dark matter." He went to Harvard after all.

But I'll miss him, especially the smells. His facewash smelled so clean, and his concoctions of Persian cuisine - Fessenjoon, Gheimeh...all learned from his (American) mother - reminded me of home. Peter was a bright, sturdy mulatto, and I hope my half-white nephew turns out so well...although I kind of hope my nephew gets more ass.

Friday, March 09, 2007

Désaccords

Rémi,

Il y a presque un an depuis notre dernier tete-à-tete, et tu me manques toujours. Pendant mon séjour à Paris, tu m'as beaucoup appris...la connaissance que tu m'as donnée en matière de chaussures est d'un valeur inestimable.

Depuis un an, j'ai suivi tes anciens conseils sans hésitation. J'essaye de m'habiller - et me chausser bien sûr mengs - exactement comme toi. Je cours tout les matins.

Mais récemment, j'ai commencé à avoir certains petits doutes sur ta philosophie, et j'ai corrigé quelques erreurs:

D'abord, je crois qu'il faut éjaculer une fois par jour.

Ensuite, un vagin doit etre 100% epilé. La moindre poile est inadmissible, genre Hollywoodienne. Comme ca, on peut voir la forme.

Enfin, coupe tes cheveux jusqu'au bout. Les filles cherchent un homme de volonté, pas de beauté.

Shanghai-nee.

Maboud

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Starfucks Hottie

I never thought it would come to this...but I bought a CD at Starbucks today. I feel like such a dirtass.

In other news, got an update from Rémi, he's in Shanghai:

Maboud,

My cock is in fire. You lied to me: I did not have any sexual intercourses at Princeton, the girls were so monstrous!! (I think I am for the West coast, my body is more Californian.)

I have bought three new pairs of shoes since you left. Did you succeed in wearing my shoes? It is extremely astonishing, you fit 45 !! I fit 42,5 ..

Anyway, we have the same penis size..

I have been thinking a lot about you, your hairs, the piano, and your sense of humor. I am sure it is not a matter to be "chauve" . You will be fine. Look at me, It seems I have a kind of spaghetti n ° 1 hairs .

In order to prepare your funeral ceremony, I decided to learn the piano. I have finished the first part of the Mozart Fantasia in C minor so far, I am working really hard!!

Since you are not here for the jogging, I am thinking about Kung fu. But people do not sweat as much as you. I miss that, I mean I miss the smell.

In Shanghai, there is not that much avocado, and because in our friendship there is no excuse, but only love I think you have to come over here very soon!


Rémi