Saturday, June 09, 2007

Top 10 failed Whole Foods pickup lines:

10. So what do you steal from Whole Foods? I always eat as much chicken as I can in line so I don't have to pay.

9. Buying the peeled carrots makes me feel effeminate.

8. Excuse me, what is the best vegetable?

7. So can you believe Wal-Mart is trying to step into the organic game?

6. Are you allergic to gluten too? (in the rice cake section)

5. Nice...Fiji is the ballinest water. (as she reaches for a Fij)

4. So what criteria are most important to you in selecting an heirloom tomato?

3. Can I have your ginger?

2. Do you ever wonder why all leaves don't taste like basil?

1. Hey, my name is Matt. What's your name?


At 11:25 AM, Blogger mr. wrongway said...

Amazing. But you forgot:

"I know there isn't much room, can we squish?"


(she has picked up a fiji) "Have you ever been to the place on the bottle?"

At 1:42 PM, Blogger Dan Berger said...

amazing stuff. How can "fiji is the ballinest water" not work?

Also, props to Maboo for stealing from Whole Foods- he is so brazen about it: case in point- he is eating chicken he has clearly not paid for as he directs the sushi chefs to make him a salmon sashimi platter.

At 8:38 AM, Blogger minakimes said...

Whole Food is the L.A. Fitness of the east.

At 8:11 AM, Blogger H.Bomb said...

want to go to whole foods together? I'm bored

At 8:13 AM, Blogger H.Bomb said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

At 11:23 AM, Blogger Dan Berger said...

What happened to that press release?

At 10:20 PM, Blogger H.Bomb said...

1.5 You'll recognize me because I'll be wearing the most expensive shoes in the room. Where's the follow-through, BA!

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